Your Interpretation of Motivation Matters
What makes some people calm and unflappable while others boil with rage?
Some people meltdown at the slightest insult. When they see an unruly driver or obstructive stranger, they erupt and imagine the worst. They determine the person who does something inconvenient means to undermine them. Unruffled folks see these conditions differently.
Why do motives matter?
What someone does often matters less than their motivation, which reflects their integrity. When a driver cuts you off on the avenue, it matters whether they are dashing to take a pregnant passenger to an emergency room. It’s different if there’s no reason to drive like a speed freak.
Your rage may result from misinterpretation if you feel thunder in your bones at the slightest provocation. Maybe you imagine people mean you harm. Nobody is calm if they suspect someone plans to injure them. They get defensive.
They turn to fight-or-flight when a driver cuts them off. Their inner alarm tells them to feud. The result is impatience, tears, hostility, or acute anxiety.
If you assume people are purposely thoughtless, no wonder you shriek and cuss under your breath. Composed people imagine others will have acceptable reasons for their actions and give them the benefit of the doubt.
Awareness aids calm
Awareness can help you break free from behavior patterns that make you unhappy. When events upset you, it will encourage you to recognize your anxiety is building.
Consider why someone acts as they do, considering neutral or positive motives.
Also, when you make mistakes, think about your motives. You act in good faith and expect positive results. It will be easier to forgive people and stay relaxed when you let yourself off the hook and apply similar reasoning to others.
Most people have good intentions. They are, however, sometimes so full of their objectives that they lose sight of their impact on others. You will not fume so readily when you recognize this.
Even when people operate without good intent, their conduct might stem from anxiety. Still, you need not let them off misdemeanors scot-free. But you can stop taking their behavior to heart and shift from anger to understanding and calm.
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Bridget Webber is a writer and nature lover, often found in the woodland, meadow, and other wild places. She writes poetry and stories and pens psychology articles; her love of discovering what rests inside the thicket and the brain compels her to delve deep. She’s appeared in many leading publications and ghostwrites for professionals who can’t spare the time to pen compositions.
