Lonely Writer Even Ruins Relationship with His Dog: But You Need Not Do the Same
You can’t always get everything done when you’re a writer, and as your love of putting pen to paper comes first, other everyday activities are bound to fall by the wayside. Occasionally, though, writers stop necessary actions so they can write more, and this has a negative impact on their lives.
Take Kip the dog’s owner, for instance. His routine consists of, or rather used to consist of, two walks a day. Each morning and evening, before darkness fell, Kip and his playwright owner enjoyed trailing through the meadows and woods, breathing in the fresh air, and exercising.
Now though, Kip’s walks have been cut short, and he’s miserable.
Although somewhat tongue-in-cheek, my words contain an element of truth. If you write, even part time or as a hobby, you must choose how to spend time wisely. It’s important to make sure you don’t accidentally cut short quality time with those you love, or stop other beneficial activities.
Set your priorities
Just this morning, I had a conversation with a friend about how a couple we know get on much better than they used to and can often be seen holding hands: A gesture of togetherness. We recall when they spent more time apart. They argued a lot and seemed distant.
Now, they are very much a loving couple. We decided it’s probable they have learned to appreciate each other. They are aging and recognize their relationship is one of the most precious elements of their lives.
Writing is a solitary task, and many writers enjoy time alone. They work well by themselves, otherwise, they wouldn’t be so attracted to their craft. The only trouble is, as a writer, you might lose track of other parts of your life and let them slip away if you aren’t careful. Then again, like the couple I mention, you could note what means the most in your life now and feed it with care.
It’s all too common for writers to get swept up in their work and creativity, and they have less attention and energy to give partners and other family members they love.
Writers often enjoy their craft so much they get too involved in it, and there’s a possibility neglecting friends and family could have negative consequences.
You need not be lonely just because you write. Some writers accept loneliness comes with their job, but the truth be known, you have a choice. You will want to squirrel yourself away in your private writing nook and put a “do not disturb” sign on the door. It’s natural to want peace and quiet when you write. Nonetheless, you can also schedule time to be with loved ones and enjoy different pastimes too.
Make sure you set aside time to catch up with household members, and family who don’t live with you, on a regular basis. Maybe you could eat one meal a day with your spouse, rather than sneaking a tray of food into your writing den by yourself, and discuss the day’s events, for example.
Sometimes, you won’t want to stop writing long enough to attend celebrations and local events that help you keep in touch with friends and your local community, but it’s worth making an effort. Put down your pen, or let go of your keyboard, now and then so you build relationships and maintain those you have already created.
Remind loved ones they count
You would think your loved ones know you care about them. After all, you make sacrifices, and maybe your writing skills help you contribute to the household income. Nonetheless, your people might need reminders about your affection for them. As well as spending time with those you care for, tell them how you feel.
One of the main regrets of people close to death (a little drama here) is they haven’t told their loved ones how much they appreciate them and love them.
They pass away with a sense of sadness about not being with them enough and sharing their feelings. As a writer, you are in danger, more than most, perhaps, of keeping loving thoughts to yourself because your natural tendency is to be alone.
Plenty of writers are introverts, or have such rich inner worlds they can happily exist alone longer than other folks. Eventually, though, loneliness plays a part in their experience. If you interact with friends and family, and remember writing isn’t everything, even though if feels like it is, your well-being and relationships won’t suffer just because you write.
If you enjoyed this article, you might like these too:
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Let those writers who’ve trodden the boards before you help you get it right
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Copyright © 2019 Bridget Webber. All rights reserved